King Charles and Queen Camilla rolled out the red carpet yesterday, September 17, as they officially welcomed former U.S. President Donald Trump and First Lady Melania Trump to Windsor Castle for their second state visit to the United Kingdom. The couple’s arrival aboard Marine One was met with ceremony and tradition, as Prince William and Princess Kate greeted them before the King and Queen extended their formal welcome.

But while the event included all the trappings of royal pageantry—military bands, polished carriages, and the grandeur of Windsor Castle—what really stirred headlines had little to do with pomp. Instead, it was Melania Trump’s decision to offer handshakes rather than curtsies that ignited fierce debate both in Britain and across the Atlantic.

Handshake or Curtsy?

As the Trumps greeted Charles, Camilla, William, and Kate, observers quickly noticed that neither Donald nor Melania adhered to traditional gestures of deference. The former president didn’t bow, and the First Lady did not curtsy. Dressed in a navy blazer over a white blouse, Melania extended her hand confidently, choosing a modern approach over the old-world formality many expected.

To some, this was a glaring breach of etiquette. Critics online were quick to pounce, branding her “classless” and “disrespectful.” One outraged commenter insisted, “They should’ve bowed and curtsied to both sets of royals!”

Others, however, brushed off the controversy, arguing that Americans are under no obligation to follow royal traditions. “They are the President and First Lady of the United States of America,” one defender wrote. “We won our independence from England centuries ago. Why should they bow or curtsy?”

Royal Etiquette Explained

So, what does royal protocol actually require? According to the official website of the British royal family, bows and curtsies are not mandatory. “There are no obligatory codes of behavior when meeting a member of the Royal Family,” the site states. “Many people wish to observe traditional forms—men bowing the head and women performing a small curtsy—but others prefer simply to shake hands.”

By that standard, Melania Trump’s handshake was perfectly acceptable. And while tradition might favor the curtsy, the royal family itself acknowledges that modern gestures of respect are equally valid.

A Historical Perspective

Some online commentators attempted to close the debate by pointing to history. They reminded readers that the American Revolutionary War and the Treaty of Paris in 1783 formally ended the colonies’ subordination to the British Crown. From that moment on, Americans ceased to be bound by royal customs.

That doesn’t mean U.S. leaders can’t observe courtesies as a diplomatic gesture. Many do. But there is no legal, political, or cultural obligation to follow traditions that no longer apply to an independent nation.

The Trumps and Royal Traditions

This isn’t the first time the Trumps have sparked conversation over their approach to royal etiquette. During a 2018 visit, Donald Trump shook hands with Queen Elizabeth II instead of bowing. In 2019, during a state banquet, he placed his hand on the Queen’s back, a move some deemed overly familiar.

This time around, the president also raised eyebrows by performing a military salute during the ceremonial welcome. According to U.S. law, the salute is reserved for service members and veterans, while civilians—including the president—are expected to place their hand over their heart. Still, every president since Ronald Reagan has saluted troops in ceremonial contexts, making Trump’s action more in line with modern presidential custom than a glaring error.

The Bigger Picture

What this incident reveals is less about Melania Trump’s manners and more about how easily modern audiences latch onto symbolic gestures. In the age of social media, where every movement is scrutinized, a handshake can become a flashpoint for cultural debate.

Supporters argue that obsessing over curtsies is clinging to outdated rituals. Critics counter that even symbolic traditions carry weight, especially in moments of diplomacy. Both sides agree on one thing: the discussion says more about the public’s hunger for controversy than about the First Lady’s choice of greeting.

In the end, Melania Trump’s handshake wasn’t a snub, nor was it a statement. It was a decision well within the guidelines of the royal family itself. And while it may not satisfy those who cherish centuries-old customs, it reflected a modern reality: the bond between the United States and the United Kingdom no longer depends on bows and curtsies, but on respect expressed in whichever form feels most authentic.